It is a good thing I have friends who send me stories about themselves like the story below, because people, I am losing it. Seriously. I'm moody, I'm yelling and screaming constantly, my kids are driving me crazy and I just want everyone to leave me alone. Don't touch me, don't look at me, don't talk to me. Well, except for this morning when I was asleep on the couch and I was stirred almost awake by a kiss on the cheek from CJ after he woke up at the other end of the couch. THAT was good. Oh, and Ace. He can hang with me whenever. He wants nothing but food three times a day. I can handle that. All he does is follow me around and lays down close to wherever I am and purrs. So unless you are a six year old who can't get enough of me or you are a little orange cat, I suggest you keep a clear distance of me until I recover from this. Here's hoping I DO recover from this.
Here it is. THE.WORST.LAUNDRY.STORY.EVER. by Jo's friend, Dr. B.
This is not a story I can share with everyone but you seem as though you could take panty disasters in stride...always check pockets!
So I get up this morning, take a shower, get dressed, and set off on my day. All was well until I swung out of my car at school, at which point I felt a strange and painful pinching sensation in the front of my pants. What the heck? I tried a few discreet tugs to no avail. Finally I dropped off my daughter, got back in the car, and unzipped my jeans. My underwear appeard to be stuck to me. I tried a tug, which was extremely painful, and looked again. What appeared to be a Starburst candy was melted, smoothly and evenly, to the front of my underwear, and as I drove around it had glued itself to me with an apparently permanent bond. In the end I had to go home, take a big breath, and rip them off, resulting in a bizarre inverse bikini wax that left me bare (and bleeding) right up the middle. (I threw the undies out.) Really, can you believe this? I wouldn't if it hadn't happened to me!
I assured Dr. B. that once the hairs grow back and the scabs are gone, she too, will think this is hilarious!
Oh, Just Shut Up and Lie Down Somewhere
8 hours ago