Thursday, May 28, 2009

There is nothing more disgusting

During the 24 hour period of trying to get my toilet to run smoothly, I have decided there is nothing more disgusting than a plunger. It gets immersed in water full of shit, piss, toilet paper and shitty piss water. You have to push the plunger up and down in the shitty piss water, stirring it all up so that the surface of the plunger and part of the handle is now 100% covered with the shitty piss water. And occasionally, some of the shitty wet TP and other disgusting parts are clinging to the plunger for dear life.

I would like to know exactly what to do with it AFTER you have coated the damn plunger with shitty piss water? The damn toilet is not unclogged yet so I can't rinse it off in there, it's still full of shitty piss water. You can't just toss it back in the closet. For the love of god and all that is holy, it's covered with shitty piss water. My husband works for an international consumer products company, currently his brand is laundry detergent, but he will soon be transitioning to a new project in the tissue/towel brands. Certainly, between detergent and TP, he can come up with a purification product for shitty piss covered plungers. Something like those flushable wipes or flushable toilet wand cleaners. Maybe a contraption that lets me dip the shitty piss covered plunger into an anti-bacterial fluid that immediatly sterilizes the plunger. SOMETHING so I don't worry about spreading e-coli or some other feces transferring bacteria from my toilet to my utility closet. Who knows where the bacteria will go to after that!

So if you are wondering what I actually DID do with the plunger in between plunges, I balanced it delicately across the toilet bowl so any drips would either settle on the rim of the toilet bowl or drop into the the toilet. Still gross, but it was better than just tossing it in the closet. Once the toilet was running free and clear, I gave the plunger a good rinse in the "clean" toilet water. Yeah, now it's sterilized. Ha.

13 comments:

  1. eewwwwww...that's got to be one of the worst jobs ever. I usually make my husband deal with any toilet/plumbing issues.

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  2. Oh Jo,

    I love it!!! You wonder why they don't make toilet plungers disposable. You plunge and plunge and then you just flush it right on down the toilet where the damn thing belongs.

    You have a great sense of humor, thank you for the follow! You need a grab me button I would love to put it on my site under "Must Read Blogs"

    Have great Day!
    Polly :)

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  3. I have always wondered about correct plunger protocol as well. There has to be something that can be done to stop the transfer to yuck all over the house.

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  4. I have heard that the kitchen has more bad bacteria.

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  5. I've considered this dilemma many a time. I file it under if I don't think about it it'll go away.

    Tell your husband to get to work on that product. Or insist that he does more emphatically.

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  6. okay, now that i have stopped laughing...

    i think there's your million dollar idea, right there! don't wait for your husband's company to invent it! i'd use it.

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  7. Luckily I have not had to use a plunger because I would be thinking the same dang thing.

    Good to hear it is now running fine again!

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  8. There have been days when I've said a silent prayer while my boys are in the bathroom for this very reason. They are master toilet pluggers, and I hate that damn plunger!

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  9. I get the ICKS when I need a plumber, because they've in shit at someone else's house and it's not MY shit. Then they walk through my house wearing their SHOES, then they set their plunger IN MY TUB, etc. After they leave, I have the cleanest most sterile house in the city! As for the plunger, I put mine in the garage. Every time my son-in-law visits, the toilet overflows. I want to yell "SQUEEZE IT OFF AND FLUSH, THEN GO FOR ROUND TWO!" idiot

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  10. I meant "they've BEEN in..." etc.

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  11. Hi! I just wandered onto your blog for the first time this morning. I realize that your post was meant to be a humorous vent and your question probably rhetorical but surprisingly, I actually know what to do with the nasty plunger. Unfortunately, this is because with a family of 7 we use that thing a lot.

    Take an empty, clean, gallon plastic milk jug and cut off the top around the opening and halfway down one side, keeping the handle intact. Short enough to easily rest the plunger in it, long enough to cover the plunger. Then throw it away and replace with a new one when needed. I realize that this is not an attractive solution but definitely much more sanitary than anything else. I suppose you could cover it with contact paper but that would only confuse my kids and they would walk away from an overflowing toilet because the plunger didn't jump out into their hands. Or if you wanted something in color you could try a laundry detergent bottle. We go through 7 gallons of milk a week so I never thought to try anything else. Then when I'm cleaning bathrooms, I squirt the cleaner in the toilet, set the plunger in to soak and walk away to do something else for a few minutes.

    Well, everybody's good at something. My other gift is yelling (at my kids or anyone else who needs it.)

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  12. I am so glad I came here to comment because Diane has saved my life. I'm not even going to comment what I WAS going to comment, I'm just going to say that I love Diane.

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  13. Sassy - Awww . . . Thanks! Glad to help!

    That could go on my epitaph, "she knew what to do with the plunger."

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