Wednesday, February 18, 2009

What won't you blog about?

I have seen this discussed on a few occasions lately and even had a commenter say to me not too long ago, "Your husband must not read your blog."

So here are my blog rules that I have set for myself. I don't blog about anything regarding my husband or our relationship, our families, and so on, that I haven't said or wouldn't say to him. I follow the same rules when discussing him with friends. I have a few friends who will say something about their husbands, husband's or own family, etc. and then they say "Don't tell him that I said that" or "Don't tell him we talked about this" or they will whisper their conversation if their husband is within hearing distance. I don't do that. There isn't a whole lot I wouldn't say to my husband if I thought it or felt it. He actually appreciates the fact that I discuss some of my frustrations, issues and pissy moments regarding him, his and my family, with friends because that means I am not screaming at him about it. I assure you, though, if I am bitching to you about it, he has already gotten an earful. It's not anything cruel or vicious, it just may not be the nicest discussion in the world. But I say it, he says it and we don't need to tippy toe around each other in regards to venting to one another or to others. And that's how it ends up on my blog. If it's not MG discussed/to be discussed, you won't be reading about it here and you won't be hearing me talk about it.

As for my kids, I won't blog about anything that would be overly embarrassing to them. I won't out them on anything they wouldn't most likely share with their friends or extended family. They deserve some privacy. I will blog about silly things they say or do, which may be a LITTLE embarrassing for them, but not to the point of them crawling in a corner.

As for friends, I don't blog about them much except for fun and good things. I don't really have negative things to blog about them and if I did, I wouldn't.

As for in-laws, parents, siblings, acquaintances and people I pass on the street - that's a free for all. I (assume) they are not reading and if they are, it's not because I invited them here (with the exception of one of MG's sisters) and they will either have to deal with what they read or stop reading. If you have followed me for very long, you know I had this situation recently and changed my blog address and went somewhat incognito. I guess it worked, but I probably won't ever know for sure since when I did find out about it a couple of months ago, it was by accident. They had been reading for over a year without comments or a shout out that they stumbled upon my blog. (Although my husband is pretty sure my MIL, yes HIS mother, left the comment that led to this response.)

So those are my guidelines. What guidelines do you have, if any?

11 comments:

  1. You are a little more disciplined than I in the kid department. Maybe because 1 of mine is an adult and the other will be there in Nov. Sometimes, I feel a little embarrassment is necessary in order to get them to straighten up and fly right. Sometimes it doesn't work.

    Otherwise, I try to blog to make people laugh, sometimes that doesn't work either, but I always make the attempt.

    I usually tell stupid stuff that I have done. Sometimes I rant about my idiot callers. But as a faithful stalker, you know all that ;)

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  2. So far, there really hasn't been much that's off limits! I do not ever mention my ex by name, first or last. He is always The Ex. He doesn't know I write a blog (I've managed to keep it a secret for almost a year now, but if he ever Googled me the gig would be up) but he would be thoroughly pissed that I talked about his affair. Other than that, I pretty much let it all fly!

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  3. i have pretty much the same guidelines for myself regarding hubs and boys. we are all very open, so in turn, i am open about them on the blog. like you, if i say it on the blog, i have said it to their faces.

    i do get into more detail on my son's illness than he would probably like, but that is because it is one of the reasons i started the blog. there is so much that goes on in my head that i would never say to him that needs to get out. but he is not interested in my blog at all and i usually will bury a post after a while if i think it is too emotional.

    now, my in laws and parents are total fodder. they live far enough away that i could get a head start, if i needed to. they irritate the heck out of me and certainly haven't spared my feelings in the past.

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  4. I think I was that commenter, wasn't I? But I was mostly trying to be funny when I asked that.
    I have about the same guidelines as you. I try not to put anything on there that would embarrass someone I care about. Public people are fair game.

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  5. It may be hard to believe- but I'm the same- anything I write- my husband's already heard it! I'm not too good at keeping things secret.

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  6. I try not to discuss family and friends too much. It worries me that whatever you say is out there forever.

    Hubby and I have an agreement that I can post about him if I am irritated or frustrated with him. Out of respect for him I try to keep things light though, even if I am frustrated.

    As far as my daughter goes I realize that I am putting her out there by talking about her on my blog at all but I try not to give away too much personal info and mostly try to cover the cute things and the normal growing up things that are too embarrassing...in case she comes across my blog in 10 years. ;)

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  7. I kind of have this thing where I blog about more personal things (when I address those topics)(which is sort of rare) on the fringes. I don't name my husband or my kids, or myself for that matter. It's no secret where I work, but I am not a work hater, so I don't think I'm disparaging my employer. I also don't have photos of us up, and while I sometimes think that might be a bit strict, it's just something I started from the beginning.

    Anyway, my thought is like yours. I'm not inclined to blog about something without first having spoken of it with my husband or kids. It's not their blog, and so it's not my place to make it theirs by dragging them into something they never asked to be part of.

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  8. My husband doesn't read my blog, but there really isn't anything that I would say on the blog that would be hurtful to him. I hope I haven't. I use my blog as more of a journal type and I wouldn't care if he did read it.

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  9. Holy crap with the MIL comments. Way out of line. (Her, not you).

    I've got boring rules, seeing as how my immediate family knows my blog address, and one has given it out to his S.O. and her family. Therefore, my posts are limited to stupid stories about myself, since I can't talk about my father, brother, brother's S.O., or my OWN S.O. in any depth because the whole world I live in knows about it. Sheesh. My mother is free game because she doesn't care what anyone thinks.

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  10. I'm naughty. I dish on my expats "friends." I don't make fun of the good friends, but I do poke fun at the clueless ones. Husband and kids are mostly used as backround to get a point across.
    What do you think? Keep the dish or give it up?

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  11. I follow pretty much the same rules that you do. Although... I kinda feel like my kids are fair game. I gave birth to the little shits and sometimes they make me want to sell them to the circus (like right now!). So if my blogging about them keeps them out of the big top -- they should be good with that!

    That said -- I also keep my blog pretty anonymous and the only people who know about it are super close friends and my bloggy pals. As for hubby, I've got way worse dirt on him than I've spilled on the blog so far. I'm thinking of it as an opportunity to keep him in line. He knows if he does some stupid shit -- I'm gonna share it with the world!

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