Friday, October 31, 2008
I have talked before about my cluttered brain. It's cluttered again - overwhelmed, tired and maybe just a little fucking bored. That means a few things - my house is a mess, my kids have no clean clothes to wear, their projects that they need help with are only half-assed finished, I have no candy for Halloween, and I am going shopping. For clothes. For me. Today. At least I know that generally, after a good night's sleep and some good socializing, it goes away. I honestly think that what brings this on is that too much is going on at one time. I volunteer a lot, my kids always have something going on, my husband always wants sex, I work (even if just a few hours a week), and I have the usual stuff that someone running a household has - you know, trying to feed your family and keep your kids clean. It's easier for me to just shut down - my thoughts, my actions - and withdraw into my own little world inside my head. I am so good at tuning everyone and everything out. I hear my kids calling my name, but it could take me a good few minutes to say "What?". Usually that's after they come and tap me on the shoulder and say "MOM" real loud in my face. I haven't found a way to tune that out yet. But I'm working on it. Lexapro anyone?